Where in the World of EMS is A.J.?

In Auckland, New Zealand at the 2016 Paramedics Australasia Conference FERNO SIM Games, November 16, 2016

The audience was in place and the judges were at their ready in Auckland New Zealand for the 2016 Paramedics Australasia FERNO SIM Challenge, a clinical competition patterned after the JEMS Games at EMS Today. Several of the teams participating had, in fact, competed in Baltimore and Washington DC at previous JEMS Games events.

The crowd, (and sequestered teams), were unaware of what was about to unfold.

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Then, in comes A.J. Heightman, special envoy from United States President-elect Donald Trump, and newly appointed EMS Ambassador to New Zealand and Australia, escorted by two Secret Service Agents.

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He inciting he crowd immediately, telling them that President Trump “would build a wall between New Zealand and Australian to keep competing Rugby Teams, sea monsters and Mr. Trump, out of New Zealand, and keep New Zealand’s sheep out of Australia (Local joke!)!”
As Ambassador Height spoke and riled up the crowd, an attempted assassination attempt unfolds.
A man rushes forward with a weapon and is immediately shot in the chest and through-and-though his left upper leg.  He drops.
Then a second would be assassin leaps from his chair with a club in his hand (the gun laws are strict in New Zealand – so a club was the best he could get) and rushed toward a stunned Heightman.
He is immediately Tazed by the second Secret Service Agent and drops to the ground yelling Alla Alla Heightman!  1g

 

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The crowd is in disbelief

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The agent push Heightman up against a wall

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Then out of nowhere a crazed young woman by the name of Krystal Meth, a sister to the club wielding (Tazed) terrorist, rushed toward the podium. Guns drawn, the Secret Service orders her to her kness and she is immediately by zip ties. Heightman, in true Trump style, yells “Kill the b%tch!”
But they do not. (You see – shee holds the key to the competition because she yields valuable information on her Tazed brother and only she can unlock the secrets of his prior hear attacks and medical conditions, like Hep-C” and control their next steps —–
IF they ask the “crazed witch” – and witch she was – rivaling famed JEMS Games actor Fran Hildwine as she begged that her hands be untied, crawled around the floor to attempt to steal paramedic scissors and, at one point, bargained that “if you free my hands, I’ll tell you more about my brother!”

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ENTER – Team #1 – SOUTH AUSTRALIA

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Team confers on cardiac rhythm because – with several prior cardiac arrests in his history – the Tazed victim will soon go fro tachycardia to cardiac arrest if they do not “Light him up” as they say in the NZ/Australia region!

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ENTER – Team #2 – United Voice – from Queensland Australia

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To pacify the wiggly little assailant as she remains a crawling, yelling, pain in the ass to them, one team member resorts to disco dancing with her!  It did not calm Krystal Meth down!
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ENTER – Team #3 – Ambulance Victoria

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A crew member elevated the hypotensive legs of the Tazed gentleman – up via the Lifepak 15 monitor – BRILLIANT MOVE!  Extra points earned ????

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A.J. brought over a new TrueClot Hemmorhage Trainer to challenge the crews with wound packing and clotting.  It worked exceptionally well.

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ENTER – Team #4 – St. John New Zealand

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“GIVE ME BACK THOSE SCISSORS – you …!”

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JUNCTIONAL SAM PELVIC TOURNIQUET APPLIED

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FLAT A.J. makes a appearance!

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Having enough, one paramedic finally duct taped Krystal’s mouth as another ran a strip across her lap and taped her to the wooden floor! S

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ENTER – Team #5 – Auckland UNIVETSITY of TECHNOLOGY (“AUT”)

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Krystal Meth was, in fact Krystal Chapman, Co-chair of the Student Paramedics Australasia.  She was an Academy Award winning credit to our profession.  Watch for her at the JEMS Games (???????)

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IT’S ALL OVER BUT THE CLEAN UP!!!

The winners (Gold-Silver-Bronze) will be announced at the Paramedics Australasia Banquet on Saturday night.  Watch for follow-up reports and photos from A.J. in New Zealand!